Love itself is a beautiful thing. Even if around it, what you have experienced is good and bad, and even some of it will cause you pain to the bone marrow, but it can not counteract its beauty. If people encounter misfortune in love, most of the time it is that the person he meets is not good enough, not that the love is bad. Another part of the situation is that you are not mature enough to blame each other.
of course, the most regrettable thing is that you are all very good, but there is no fate, so the relationship has not come to an end.
so, I never complain about how hard love has given me. In my eyes, no matter it is bitter or sweet, the experience is a part of my life. without the past, there is no present, let alone the future.
another thing is that even if love is beautiful, I don't regard it as the only focus of life. To put it simply, I won't give myself the chance to become the brain of love, so love can't hurt me seriously. The breakup will still hurt like will still be perturbed, but without love, I can still live very well.
and with it, I won't let love overwhelm my life.
on the topic of love brain, readers often send private messages to me backstage, saying that this is a terrible view of love, which is extremely painful.
but in fact, love is complicated because it is very subjective. Its temptation is that as long as it does not exceed the legal boundaries, no matter how much you toss around, it is possible to get a unique favor, in case the other party prefers this one of yours.
although we all say that trying to be better will give you the capital to meet better people, who don't hope that even if you are a bad person, no matter how bad you are, and no matter how frightening your situation is, there will be an indomitable person who will jump into your hole. There are always a few lucky people in the world who have this kind of treatment, so we can look forward to the most beautiful appearance of love. no matter how the stars change, there is always one person who loves you as much as one.
the reason why so many people fall into the strange circle of the brain of love is that the brain of love is similar to the supreme love that is rare in a century, that is, being in it is easy to create a noble sense of "desperate".
regardless of whether people admit it or not, desperate love is quite intoxicating. It is easy for some people to move or even brainwash themselves. The movie "abandoned Pine Nuts" is a classic case, which is told over and over again. Pine nuts because of the lack of love, too want to get boyfriend's love, humble to the dust, pay without complaint. Even in the face of her boyfriend's violent tendency, she comforted herself: "beat me or scold me, I love me too much, I can't leave him."
she spent her whole life searching for love, but what did she get in the end?
countless betrayals, and left in the dry river, their cold corpses.
well, it's terrible. once people fall in love, they will lose their basic judgment, and they will not have their thoughts and opinions. This kind of love will not come to a good end, often hurting themselves and others.
Yes, falling in love can also hurt people's brains. It has two directions, one is to "humble yourself", see the life of pine nuts. There is also a direction called "oppressing others". The story told by a reader to me is just right.
he sent a long text in the background, counting his weakness.
he said it was difficult for him to explain to his girlfriend why he couldn't quit just because there was a beautiful new female colleague in the department-this job is still very important to him. But more importantly, his girlfriend will force him to ask: is the work important or my feelings more important?
he hypnotized himself many times, "what a woman wants is an attitude, not a reason," but things went in a direction he could not imagine. His girlfriend inexplicably turned things into choosing one of the two, either to her or to work. But the scariest thing is that he has chosen countless times in this relationship, and each time he is driving him crazy.
but did not expect that his girlfriend has won so many times is not satisfied, must completely occupy his life. So in the end, he had no choice but to break up. It is not that he does not cherish his feelings, but that he knows that there will be a similar choice between the two in the future, and he does not want to let life make way for feelings anymore.
the truth is that when a relationship is constantly destroying my normal life with the way of "choose one of the two", why should I still have this relationship?
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this is another scary part of the brain of love. The other person may not only sacrifice herself because she loves you too much, but she may also be full of control because she loves you too much.
Love brain is so complicated that I can't even define it completely, but on the whole, it is bound to make people paranoid. to put it simply, this paranoia can distort the normal life of one of the two parties in a relationship, either you or him.
so putting an end to love is my motto in love.
as to how to put an end to it?
Gibran wrote this poem in the Prophet:
"We must love each other, but do not bind love; fill each other's glasses, but do not drink together." Give bread to each other, but do not eat the same piece together. Sing and dance together, and each of you must be alone. "