"it's not that you don't deserve it, but you don't dare."
in the latest issue of "Strange work Theory", Jiang Sida has a wonderful 13-minute discussion. His position is that "keeping in touch at all times is a tyranny". Inside, he talked about such an example:
when we are in love, we often have this situation: why send a message on WeChat first? If the other party doesn't reply, send a "?" Still did not reply, will send a series of "what's going on?", "Why didn't you reply to my message?" Then at eight o'clock in the evening, facing a cell phone that hasn't responded all day, say, "Don't you love me anymore?"
he said, "did you find out? When I don't have a cell phone, we don't deserve to love someone. The foundation of love is the mobile phone. "
this summary sounds ridiculous, but it feels irrefutable-how can love to be based on a mobile phone? But our relationship is deformed and depends on this expressionless and emotionless machine.
Love master Yoyo once instilled in me this view: "I'm telling you, how much a guy likes his girlfriend depends on how often he shows his girlfriend in moments." If he likes it, he can't wait to tell the world that he has a girlfriend. If he doesn't like it, he can hide it deeply and leave a way out. "
my best friend cc complained to me about her boyfriend, saying that he always didn't reply to his Wechat in time: "I don't even know what he's up to. It only takes a few seconds to reply to Wechat. You can tell me what you're up to." He doesn't care about me at all. "
the lovers around us, who are touted as "very loving", share the sweetness of their relationship like this: "We make a phone call every night before we go to bed, and we have a video call at least once a week. His WeChat avatar is also me, and I am also the background of his moments."
when he was with his ex-boyfriend, he went to another city for a week because of his internship. During that week, I was very busy because of the approach to the final exam, I buried myself in the library all day. I often spend an afternoon reading books and a whole day in the library. I didn't see his Wechat until an hour later, and after studying for a long time every day, I didn't want to speak at all when I got back to my dorm in the evening. So a week later, he broke out at me and asked me angrily, "Why didn't you take the initiative to call me?"
I was still flipping through a thick book in my left hand and holding a pen that was writing in my right hand, so I replied helplessly: "I am very tired because I am busy." So I didn't call you voluntarily. "
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"Don't you like me?"
I froze all of a sudden-don't you like it if you don't call?
I need your Wechat to call back in seconds, need you to call me every day, need your moments cover is me, Wechat avatar has me.
I need you to prove to me again and again that you love me-- use your cell phone.
if there is no cell phone, it seems that our love will become thin. You can't ask me anytime, anywhere, "what's the baby doing?" I can't show my love in moments. If we're apart, we won't be able to say good night to each other at night, or even know that each other hasn't come home all night.
then my heart began to panic and began to feel empty and uncomfortable. You think about the other person's movements and guess what he's doing right now. You wish you could turn on the lock screen and turn it off hundreds of times just to see if you had heard from him.
you can't help waiting, so you get suspicious.
can't we all have a good relationship without a cell phone?
you might as well admit that you don't need a mobile phone, you just lack a sense of security.
We expand our desire to peep and form an abnormal desire and expectation for our lovers.
so the mobile phone has become the basis of love.
the lack of emotion causes us to urgently need tools to convey emotion.
when I was in junior high school, mobile phones were not so popular. If I like a boy, I will deliberately find an opportunity to talk to him. I will observe his behavior in my spare time and try to get in touch with him. I will observe his expression, ponder his tone, think about his mood, and wonder if he will like me.
but now, I like a guy. I might talk to him on Wechat first, observe the speed of his reply, watch his emoji, pay attention to his every circle of friends and reply, listen to the tone of his phone call, and wonder if he likes me.
beginning when you say you like you and look at each other's eyes, you will be able to understand. But now saying that I like you proves the speed of replying to Wechat and the frequency of you calling me.
is very funny and real.
the accumulation of true love requires a real relationship, a sense of certainty transmitted through body temperature, eyes, and strength.
the most romantic words I have ever heard are not only "companionship is the longest confession", but "being by your side is the longest confession."